When 67-year-old Tami Haukedahl first saw 39-year-old Claire Taylor Haukedahl on her TikTok page in November 2022, she instantly felt attracted to her.
Claire had made a video opening up about her 43-year age gap with her previous partner, who had passed away after four years together.
Feeling the sentimentality behind her tribute, she immediately sensed that Claire seemed both ‘caring and beautiful’ – and so she decided to hit the follow button and start a conversation.
At first, Tami didn’t spot the message, but when Claire sent her another one once she could see she was online, they immediately started chatting back and forth.
‘It was like an old-fashioned romance – writing to each other. Two weeks in I thought “I think I’m in love with her.” We hadn’t even spoken on the phone,’ Tami, a retired commander in the Illinois state police now living in Pensacola, Florida, shares.
And so, in January 2023, Claire decided to make the 916-mile journey to Chicago to meet Tami for the first time. Their chemistry was instant, and so they then took it in turns to fly between each other, eventually deciding in May 2023 that they didn’t want to be apart.
Since then, they haven’t spent a single day apart, tying the knot on a beach in Hawaii in August 2024 – and with their age gap, they want to make the most out of their relationship.
‘We haven’t got 50 years together. We take every day as it comes,’ Tami, who is older than Claire’s mum and has a son one year older than Claire, reflects.
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‘We may have limited time. We don’t take every day for granted.’
As such, they’re very open and honest about ageing in their relationship, with Claire, who is an investment manager, noting that in 20 years, Tami will be 85 but is ‘extremely healthy.’
She adds: ‘We can’t obsess about the future like that and can only prepare as best we can.’
Despite the fact that they ‘couldn’t be happier’ in their relationship, the couple are constantly trolled online – and told that they look like a ‘mother and daughter.’
And in public, people do sometimes stare at them. While they were out getting mulled wine together at Christmas, someone told Claire that it was ‘lovely you and your mum are out celebrating.’
Tami says: ‘A lot of it is from being gay. People associate it with “you must want people to be your mummy.” It’s just a difference in age.’
‘I’m experiencing the best love of my life. I’m grateful every day.’
Claire adds that it feels like the pair are ‘the same age,’ and that there are ‘people who identify more with people who are not their own age.’
‘You can learn a lot from people older than you,’ she shares.
In sharing their relationship journey, the couple hope that they can change societal views surrounding age gaps, with Tami noting that Claire came ‘out of the blue’ when she was 64.
‘It’s renewed my excitement for life,’ she concludes.
‘I feel loved like I have never been loved before.’
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