Game of Thrones fans are used to seeing giant beasts, but even they were shocked when they tuned in to the latest episode of Knight of the Seven Kingdoms.
You see, in the opening minutes of episode 2, titled ‘Hard Salt Beef’, viewers were treated to a glimpse of a fully nude Ser Arlan of Pennytree (Danny Webb) having a morning wee.
And it appears that the Seven blessed the hedge knight with a penis so large it would make the gargantuan Drogon a little insecure.
Seriously, you could club a giant to death with this thing.
Anyway, after the episode aired, Google Trends confirms there was a spike in people Googling ‘ Ser Arlan penis’ as they went to check if the massive member was real.
In fact, it looked so real that even showrunner Ira Parker was apparently confused if they’d used a prosthetic or not.
For the record, it wasn’t real.
According to prosthetic designer Waldo Mason, who designed the sham shaft, it was in fact a team effort to bring this new monster to life.
“Very proud to have forged Ser Arlan Pennytree’s formidable weapon for the opening moments of this episode!” Waldo wrote on Instagram.
He then shared how the second most impressive set of family jewels in Westeros was crafted (the first being the Targaryen royal jewels, of course, what did you think I meant?)
‘We were asked to create a 10” prosthetic penis for the fantastic Danny Webb to wear, naked,’ Mason explained.
‘Luckily, he was a consummate professional and was happy to work with us to make it as realistic as possible, coming in for fittings that culminated in a very intimate application process in a white tent in the Belfast countryside.
‘Because of the size, we reinforced the contact area & edges with wig lace for minimal stretch under its weight, and makeup designer @pipwoods and @lucille_wigs applied a knotted merkin, hiding any visible edges.’
Oh, and they also hid tubing in the design, meaning they could make it urinate on command.
The big question is, of course, ‘why was it important to the story for Ser Arlan to have such a large member?’Well, the answer is surprisingly sweet.
‘I felt bad for Ser Arlan at some point,’ Ira told EW. ‘He was the only person who’s ever looked out for Dunk and really stuck with Dunk.
Is Knight of the Seven Kingdoms worth watching?
Our Game of Thrones expert Rob Wilson shares his thoughts on the new spin-off…
A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms confidently expands the world of Westeros by staying away from the lords and castles of Game of Thrones and House of the Dragon.
It pulls back the curtain on those lower down the food chain in the Seven Kingdoms, and focuses especially on those who take it upon themselves to protect the innocent in this brutal feudal world.
Read the full review here.
‘And he died on a muddy road in the middle of nowhere, was buried without ceremony, and now Dunk is going around trying to find somebody who just even remembers him — people that he served for, people that he bled for, these knights and these lords.
‘They can’t even remember his name. I felt the need to give him his one special thing, to channel a little Boogie Nights, I suppose.’
So there you have it, this monstrous dong was born from an act of pity.
A Knight of the Seven Kingdoms continues on Sky and Now next Monday.
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