People use my city like a playground then leave — but it’s got so much more to offer

You know the drill. Once you hit your late 20s, your friends in London will suddenly start disappearing in their droves.

I’m guilty of doing it myself.

At 29, my husband I thought we were ready to leave the city behind and try commuter life. We moved to Tunbridge Wells, swapping a tiny one-bed rental flat in Kennington for a two-bedroom house with a garden in Kent.

But within a month we were desperate to reverse the decision.

We quickly came to realise that we weren’t done with London and started planning our move back. We missed the hustle and bustle, the nightlife and everything else it has to offer.

Five agonisingly long months later we waved goodbye to the suburbs and returned to the capital.

Our story though, is rather unique. Usually, when people ‘outgrow’ London (after several wild years spent in the likes of Infernos, The Prince and Ku Bar) and head somewhere quainter and quieter, the decision is final.

And it’s a decision that’s being made more often than you might think, as between 2009 and 2019, around 550,000 more Brits left London, than moved to it.

There are numerous reasons why people leave, but one comment you hear being banded around often is: ‘I could never bring kids up in London.’

But is it really such a bad place to stay and raise a family?

While my husband and I have no idea whether the city is going to be our forever home, there are many Londoners who are staying put — for good.

‘London is treated in such a transient manor’

Mum-of-one and life-long Londoner, Ife Akintoye, is offended by the accusation that her city is just for a good time, rather than a long time. 

The 38-year-old, who works in marketing, has lived in London her entire life and is raising her 17-year-old daughter here too.

‘London is treated in such a transient manner,’ she tells Metro. ‘It’s like a playground for a lot of people — they come and use the city to have fun for a few years and then decide it’s not good enough for them anymore.

‘I’m a little bit offended when people say they’re leaving London to raise kids, because I think they forget that it’s a real home for many people.

‘It’s somewhere people have grown up and it’s where decades worth of their family live. All of those people were kids at one point too and grew up in the city.

‘I was a child in London and I wouldn’t change my experience for the world.’

Ife, who grew up near Brixton in South London, thinks the capital is a ‘fantastic’ place to raise children, largely due to the multicultural experience it offers.

‘London is so diverse, you can go out wearing whatever you like and you’re never judged. You can walk down the street and hear one language and then turn the corner and hear another, you smell lots of different types of food – it’s a melting pot of so many different cultures.

‘As a black woman, I’ve not found anywhere else that makes me feel as comfortable and at home as London does.’

The mum says living in the city has helped her daughter become ‘super streetwise’ and brought friends into her life from an array of different backgrounds.

‘She knows how to handle herself and interact with different types of people,’ the mum explains. ‘She’s learnt so much from being in London.’

Another reason to love London, according to Ife, is its abundance of green spaces. But if for some reason Hampstead Heath or Richmond Park aren’t cutting it, she points out that you’re never far from the countryside or seaside by train.

In fact, there’s just one reason for moving out of London that Ife can get on board with: the cost.

‘If people are moving because it’s expensive, that’s fair,’ she says. ‘It is very expensive and I think as the city keeps becoming more gentrified, prices are only going to keep rising.

‘I know people that were born in London and lived their entire lives here who are being priced out. At some point I might be the same.’

She adds: ‘People should make their own choices based on what they can afford, but [the price] hasn’t put me off yet. As long as I can afford to live here, I’ll stay.’

‘It’s sad when people decide they’re done with London’

Ife isn’t the only one who feels this strongly about London. Nadia Ismail, a food content creator who posts as @southbankfoodie on Instagram says she ‘could never leave’.

Nadia was raised in Peckham, but has lived in several different parts of the city throughout her life — moving to central London for university and opting for West London when it came time to start a family.

‘Experiencing different corners of the city has given me a real appreciation of just how varied and rich each area is, almost like London is made up of dozens of little cities, each with their own personality,’ the 35-year-old tells us.

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The mum-of-one agrees that the city’s diversity is what makes it so great and it’s been especially beneficial for her job. 

‘Working within the food industry, I am constantly inspired by the diversity here — you can quite literally taste the world within a few Tube stops, or even on one street.’

She also loves that there’s ‘always something to do’ in London — from immersive experiences to world-class theatre, free museums and community events, but doesn’t think the same can be said for other parts of the UK.

‘London offers something for every mood, interest, and budget. If you know where to look, it doesn’t always have to be expensive either,’ she explains.

‘I’ve found that outside London, things close early and there’s often not much to do in the evenings. In London, you can be out late without it meaning clubbing or going to the pub – there’s such a variety of experiences.

‘The fact that we also have transport links that run frequently until quite late is also such a plus and makes living here easier (when it works!)’

Nadia’s son is seven and she has no doubt that London is the ‘perfect’ place for him to be, stating the experiences he’s able to have in the city are an ‘incredible gift’.

‘Growing up here gives him exposure to so many perspectives, and there are endless opportunities for him to learn, explore, and grow.’

She continues: ‘If people want to move, that’s entirely their choice. But personally, I could never leave. 

‘I think it’s a little sad when people decide they’re “done” with London, because in truth, you can never get bored here. The city is constantly changing, and no matter how long you’ve lived here, there’s always something new to discover.’

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